Marhaba Everyone:

Well, it has been a crazy week here! Let's see...you may remember me mentioning a woman, Jill, who lost her husband a few months ago and went to the cemetery to visit him one night. In case you're wondering why this is even worth mentioning, let me explain one of the fun little quirks of Islam: women are not allowed at funerals, gravesites, etc. Now, in most Islamic countries they simply don't let women come to funerals, but it's not a big deal if she wants to visit a gravesite or cemetery when it's not during a funeral. Of course, in Saudi Arabia, women are strictly forbidden from entering cemeteries: it is "sacred ground" where no woman should be. But Jill felt that she needed to go to say goodbye to her husband since she didn't get to be in the funeral. Jill called up Pia, another teacher who has been here for even less time than I have, and cried and begged Pia to go for a ride with her. The driver took them to the cemetery; of course, being a Westerner, Pia had no idea this was hard-core HARAM (haram=something not allowed in Islam) here!

They were there at night, and when Jill was at her husband's grave, the mutawa and police swooped in and surrounded her (Pia was waiting in the car), yelling at her that she wasn't supposed to be there, etc. Jill apparently refused to leave, so Pia had to get out of the car, go to Jill, and pull her into the car. Pia said Jill reeked of alcohol and drunkenly shared that she was wearing nothing under her abaaya. So now we're at a triple-haram, in case anybody's counting. Anyway, so the mutawa and police sent a report to the school about it, Pia got really mad at Jill for getting her in the middle of this when Pia had no idea what she was doing was illegal, and Jill got really angry too.

However, it seemed that the incident had blown over, as this all happened a few weeks ago. Not so! After Jill did something more recently to provoke the mutawa (she considers provoking them to be her part-time job, which was all well and good when her Saudi husband was alive to protect her, but now that he's gone, she's actually getting into trouble), they decided to re-open the case and petition to get both Jill and Pia deported. Our boss pulled Pia into her office to let her know she might be deported, would have to give a statement to the police, AND both of them would have to meet with a prince who would decide whether or not they got deported. Pia, understandably, was freaking out. She found out at work and was crying about it, and of course the teachers gathered around her like the gaggle of gossipers they are (let's all take a moment to appreciate that alliteration)!

True to Saudi style, they didn't tell Pia WHEN she would have to give her statement, just simply that at some point in the near future she would be going to the police station, which in this country is quite a bit more terrifying than in the USA. Stories abound of people being detained and questioned for days on end, and then of course there's the whole issue with torture...anyway. So the day after Pia was told she'd have to give a statement, Jill packed up her things and left. We found out the next day that she asked one of the teachers who just arrived a week ago to help her pack. So as far as we know, she's in America now. Last thing we knew, she was going to some appointment to talk to some lawyers or something, then--GONE! Poof!

Welcome to Saudi Arabia!!!

About 4 days later, Pia learned she would be picked up from the school and taken to the police station to give her statement. When she went, the guy who took her statement asked her why she looked so nervous! She said, "Um, because the guy next to me is in shackles?" Ok, so she didn't say it, but that's what she was thinking. After she explained to him what happened, he told her he would close the case, so she's not being deported. Alhamdulillah! I have spoken with her many times since, and she has repeatedly warned me, "Don't trust anybody here, Lizz." she is supposed to explain a bit more all that went down when I meet with her tomorrow. But suffice to say the women I work with, with whom I spend 8 hours five days a week, cannot be trusted. Which scares me because I'm a very trusting person. So I'm just hoping against hope that it doesn't backfire on me!

Well, there's more to tell, such as my friend Rasha's real winner of a husband, who continues to flirt with me in front of his wife. Luckily next week is the final week of our tutoring because then they have their test. Which deserves another whooping Alhamdulillah! This guy is quickly climbing up the creep scale, soon to surpass the old Sudanese teacher who propositioned me. In a text message! How stupid can you get?! And he's a teacher at the college!!! And he's older than my father! I had gotten some creepy vibes from him before, but tried to shrug them off as my being paranoid, but still made sure to interject, "Yes, my father has that..." or "My father does that too..." when he showed up at the food court where all the teachers hang out in the evenings. He listed his ailments: blood pressure, sleep apnea, and, the best and by far most appealing (since this was all spoken about an hour before I received the text message), an enlarged prostate. Fantastic! If that doesn't catch a lady's interest, I don't' know what will! Remember in that Tom Cruise movie, "You had me at hello..." change it to "You had me at enlarged prostate..." Hmmmm, perhaps there's a reason the line didn't go that way! But in case he didn't have me at enlarged prostate, he went on to brag about what a good Muslim he is: he always wakes up at 4 am for the first prayer, walks to the mosque for the prayers, never misses a prayer...then an hour later sent me a text message propositioning me! The only person I told about it was Randy, who's an American Muslim, and Randy commented, "Nowhere in the Qur'an or Hadith does it say 'as long as you pray five times a day, you can have extramarital affairs.' I'm sure I would have remembered that part." So there you go, in case you were wondering, this is yet another case of Haram.

Well, I'm feeling a bit harammed-out. Insha'allah (God willing) my next email will be on a more pleasant subject, and the words "deportation" and "police station"

will not appear at all!

Ma Salaama (With Peace),

Lizz